Don't talk to me as if you understand what it's like to have an asshole with a gag reflex
You’ll have to pry this post out of my cold, dead, gagging asshole before I delete it
you ever get a text and say out loud “bro leave me alone”
the best part about making someone else’s post viral is not having to deal with the notes.
You’re responsible for this heartache, bastard. Are you proud of what you wrought upon me, ya boy?
Wait... Is that what Frodo makes such a good ring-bearer? Like, he grew up on so many of Bilbo's stories about going on an adventure to climb a mountain and slay a giant fire breathing beast, and then he gets the ring and it's all "I'll give you what you most desire" and Frodo is all "Great! Got any options for "huge adventure, mountain climbing, and them destroying a great evil?""
Meanwhile Sauron's like:
I attack first. I draw my blade and take a swing. You look rather confused. This confusion is justified as we are 40 ft apart in the middle of a showdown.
"parry this you filthy casual"
wait, yeah, this is rad af
